Understanding Clinical Supervision in Washington
By Alex Regalado
The holiday season is upon us—a time filled with family gatherings, office potlucks, and social events galore. While we may look forward to these festivities, for many clients (us included), this time of year triggers significant social anxiety. Regarding our role as therapists, we can be here to help navigate these challenges.
I wanted to share some insights on helping clients cope with holiday social anxiety, drawing from my own experiences and the collective wisdom I’ve gained from my own clinical work as a therapist, and as a clinical supervisor at Firelight Supervision. Let’s dive into strategies that feel genuine and practical.
Understanding the Roots of Holiday Social Anxiety
Before jumping into solutions, it’s crucial to understand why the holidays can amplify social anxiety for some clients. The season often brings:
- Increased Social Obligations: More events mean more opportunities for social stress.
- Family Dynamics: Reunions can resurface old tensions or unresolved issues. Just because it is the holidays does not mean disagreements have subsided.
- Expectations of Joy: The pressure to be merry and “make meaning” often feels like an impossible demand if we are not feeling joyful.
- Increased Financial Demands: The indirect pressure to gift from our feelings rather than our budget may create an unwelcome unease when spending time with others.
- Other Mental Health Symptoms: With reduced sunlight and outdoor opportunities, our emotional bandwidth can take a hit lowering our overall skillfulness when coping with social interactions.
Moving Beyond Basic Coping Strategies
I find that the usual advice like “practice deep breathing” or “visualize success” can feel generic and insufficient. When I was working as a case manager on an Assertive Community Treatment team, I remember introducing a deep breathing skill to one of my clients when she was experiencing an anxiety attack. New to the field, I was proud in attempting to strategically introduce a mindfulness skill to help her cope. In turn, she had responded, “Great! I’m sure that deep breathing exercises will help solve my homelessness, upcoming surgery, and being out of my meds!”
Long story short (and if you had not caught her sarcasm), it didn’t. So let’s look beyond the basics:
1. Collaborative Planning Through Consultation
Encourage clients to actively participate in planning for the upcoming holidays. This isn’t just about creating a schedule—it’s about empowering them to make choices that align with their comfort levels. In planning, we are not aiming for “thriving;” I introduce it as “surviving.”
- Set Boundaries Together: Discuss which events are non-negotiable and which can be declined without significant consequences. Practice accepting what we can and cannot emotionally handle right now.
- Role-Play Scenarios: Use session time to practice conversations or situations they anticipate may be challenging. This can include practicing saying “no” to invites or difficult conversations with others.
By involving clients in this collaborative process, we can empower them with language to better navigate difficult conversations and boundary-setting.
2. Exploring Underlying Beliefs
Often, social anxiety is tied to deeper beliefs about oneself and others.
- Identify Negative Thoughts: Work with clients to pinpoint thoughts like “Everyone will judge me” or “I have to be perfect.”
- Challenge and Reframe: Use cognitive techniques to question these beliefs and consider alternative perspectives.
This deeper cognitive work can lead to more sustainable changes in how clients perceive social situations. I have also found this to be helpful for clients familiar with Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT). Reminding them of these skills can help tailor them to more unique upcoming situations.
3. Incorporating Mindfulness and Acceptance
Instead of solely focusing on eliminating anxiety, encourage clients to recognize and coexist with the uncomfortable.
- Mindfulness Exercises: Teach clients to observe their anxiety without judgment, recognizing that although undesired, may be playing an important role in communicating how we are feeling.
- Acceptance Strategies: Help them understand that it’s okay to feel anxious and that this doesn’t have to prevent them from engaging in meaningful activities.
4. Leveraging Supervision for Therapist Growth
As therapists, we don’t have all the answers—and that’s okay. Engaging in supervision and consultation can provide fresh perspectives and strategies.
- Case Discussions: Bring challenging cases to supervision sessions to explore new perspectives
- Peer Support: Share experiences with colleagues to gain insights and emotional support.
- Validation: Hear (and know) that you are not alone when it comes to tackling these challenging interactions.
Practical Tools to Share with Clients
Beyond deeper therapeutic work, practical tools can make a significant difference.
Social Scripts and Conversation Starters
Sometimes, the fear is simply not knowing what to say.
- Prepare Topics: Work with clients to come up with a list of safe, go-to conversation topics.
- Practice Responses: Rehearse polite ways to deflect or exit conversations that become uncomfortable.
- Set Time Limits: Encourage clients to give themselves permission to stay for a set amount of time, reducing the pressure to remain indefinitely.
Encouraging Self-Compassion
The holidays can exacerbate feelings of inadequacy or self-criticism.
- Self-Compassion Exercises: Introduce practices that foster kindness toward oneself, like writing a letter of encouragement to themselves.
- Acknowledge Small Wins: Celebrate their efforts, no matter how minor they may seem.
Reminding clients that it’s okay not to be okay can alleviate the burden of holiday perfectionism.
Staying Connected During the Holidays
Isolation can intensify anxiety. Encourage clients to maintain supportive connections.
- Schedule Check-Ins: Offer brief phone or video sessions during particularly challenging weeks.
- Peer Support Groups: Recommend community groups or online forums where they can share experiences with others facing similar challenges.
Reflecting on Our Own Practices
Finally, it’s worth noting that we, too, as therapists can feel the strains of the holiday season. Engaging in supervision and consultation helps us stay grounded.
- Self-Reflection: Use supervision to explore any countertransference or personal biases that may arise.
- Continuing Education: The holidays can be a good time to engage in professional development, refreshing our skills and approaches.
By taking care of ourselves, we enhance our capacity to support our clients effectively.
Final Thoughts
Helping clients cope with holiday social anxiety is about more than offering quick fixes. It’s about engaging with them on a deeper level, understanding their unique experiences, and providing tailored support that empowers them.
Through collaborative planning, cognitive exploration, mindfulness, and practical tools, we can make a real difference in their holiday experience. And by leaning on our own support systems—like Firelight Supervision—we ensure that we’re bringing our best selves to our work.
Remember, the goal isn’t to eliminate anxiety entirely but to help our clients navigate it with confidence and self-compassion.
How we can help
Firelight Supervision offers a multitude of supervision and clinical consultation options for your needs. After all, the better we care for ourselves and our professional development, the better we can serve our clients. Contact us today for a free phone consultation to find out how we can support your supervision needs!
Author Bio
Alex Regalado is a psychotherapist who specializes in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT), and other skills! He has experience working in community mental health, hospital settings, crisis centers, and private practice. Follow Firelight Supervision on Instagram and Facebook.
